Today, tommorrow, another day
Time takes another day
Changes you in subtle ways
Lifts you up then slowly lets you go
-Last to Know by Blue Rodeo
Did you ever feel like you were drifting through your life? Waiting, regretting, trying and failing more than living and loving? It seems these days that what makes me happiest is simply living up to my own standards. And it happens less and less every day.
I know that everyone has vices and I know that no one is perfect, but why was my resolve so strong when I was young and so weak now? Is it laziness? Is it business? Or have I weakened as a person? I've failed myself so many times that I wouldn't dare try and count them.
And yet, I live a charmed life. I'm smart, pretty, charismatic, living in the first world...why do I lament my life so? I know that droves of people wonder every day whether everyone must have problems but I wonder about those who don't let them drive their life. I feel so incomplete yet if you asked me, I'd say I love my life.
And truly, there are many things I love about my life. But everyday I feel as though I'm sitting, waiting, wishing. Am I waiting for a soul mate who will never come? Am I wasting my life with this feeling? Can I truly rationalize my way into happiness? What am I missing? How many people feel this way?
Changes you in subtle ways
Lifts you up then slowly lets you go
-Last to Know by Blue Rodeo
Did you ever feel like you were drifting through your life? Waiting, regretting, trying and failing more than living and loving? It seems these days that what makes me happiest is simply living up to my own standards. And it happens less and less every day.
I know that everyone has vices and I know that no one is perfect, but why was my resolve so strong when I was young and so weak now? Is it laziness? Is it business? Or have I weakened as a person? I've failed myself so many times that I wouldn't dare try and count them.
And yet, I live a charmed life. I'm smart, pretty, charismatic, living in the first world...why do I lament my life so? I know that droves of people wonder every day whether everyone must have problems but I wonder about those who don't let them drive their life. I feel so incomplete yet if you asked me, I'd say I love my life.
And truly, there are many things I love about my life. But everyday I feel as though I'm sitting, waiting, wishing. Am I waiting for a soul mate who will never come? Am I wasting my life with this feeling? Can I truly rationalize my way into happiness? What am I missing? How many people feel this way?
posted by Camel at 8:02 p.m.
1 Comments:
I have always comforted myself by thinking that many people feel this way and it's just that few have the courage to admit it. My personal feelings on the matter...those of us who are not afraid to admit what we feel are far better off than those who spend their lives in denial. I love my life too, for the most part, but there will always be that wondering feeling that lives within me. I just happened to find your blog while browsing...hope you don't mind my comments. Feel free to read my blog if you like. Either way, know you're not alone...
-Tara Dawn
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