deadly web

So. Today was interesting. I finally talked to my lab mates about their hate on for Ms. Movies, and I have to say that I really couldn't disagree with their reasons...it just seems like they never got to know her as a person and are just reacting to her inability to do research properly. I hadn't noticed this too much, though I did a bit..I just didn't really think about it, but it's true. Ms. Movies is a super person but has no clue about research...and she doesn't really do anything to help herself...she reacts rather than anticipates. It's true this is only partially her fault....she hasn't properly had a supervisor to guide her, but it does make things make a bit more sense. Anyway, I felt super guilty for saying bad things about Ms. Movies especially since I really liker her and value our friendship. But let's face it...there are some things about her that drive me bonkers. And lo and behold these feelings were shared...still a less public arena would have been a better idea...especially given the labmates' penchance for gossip...but oh well, Ms. Movies seems pretty set in her decision to leave at the end of her masters so it should all be fine. That said I'm not thrilled about going behind her back to have research meetings with the lab mates. But unfortunately, this is necessary for my own career. I need to be respected by my peers, I need to have these discussions and I need to not spend that time mediating amongst factions...so that's that.

Other thoughts...apparently Ms. Movies said some fairly inappropriate (dumb? I dunno...) things at the conference...which only added to the labmates not wanting to hang with us. Which immediately led to me saying "dear God! you'd tell me if I did that, right?" Ha. I only half believe them when they say that "no, no one said you said anything dumb"...especially given the amount of looking back and forth they did in responding....hard to say...but in the end, I know that people will see that I'm competent...I just have to get over the shyness I felt last year...although that was partially a product of feeling like I had to tote Ms. Movies around and partially me being intimidated by the presence of greatness....hard to say...hard to say. But I do know that I'm really starting to feel interested, challenged and knowledgeable, so I guess things will work out.

Co-supervisor told me something that another research told him....John McNamara, someone whose research I remember reading during my honors degree because it was very cross-disciplinary, quite like my own interests. He said that McNamara had knowledge in two areas: philosopy and psychology. To psychologists he talked about philosophy, to philosophers he talked about science...and I believe this is where I hope to be...social and cognitive....