Had it with this game

You know, I keep saying that I am gonna email the firefighter and say something about the fact that he hasn't been online lately. But I just don't seem to be doing it. Am I just gonna let this fade out without saying anything? Is there anything TO say?

Last night I was out at the bar with my pals and I got bored with the music and how everyone was just sitting around. So I went to talk to the bartender who is Smiley's friend and was one of the few guys in the club that I thought was cute. And I realized something: I wouldn't mind messing around with him and that's it. I've really lost that "need a relationship" vibe. I just don't need it.

It felt even more weird when I was talking to a few other guys at the bar while the bartender worked. One had a girlfriend and one was clearly not interested in me. And I REALLY didn't care. I just wanted to talk to new people.

This is weird.

More music for him:

All the fear has left me now
I'm not frightened anymore
It's my heart that pounds beneath my flesh
It's my mouth that pushes out this breath

And if I shed a tear I won't cage it
I won't fear love
And if I feel a rage I won't deny it
I won't fear love